We have a winner. Rakkasan69.
Update 1: The responses to this question, so far, may be the funniest and/or angriest ones yet.
Update 2: Uncle Jimbo and David Bellavia are doing a segment on this question as part of their radio show on Wednesday. Word on the range, they're going to award an awesome prize to the Blackfive Reader with the best answer. So if you're saving your best response for a different AaI question, definitely time to re-examine your strategy.
Update 3: If you need advice on how to give advice, please see the original Ask an Infantryman post for guidance.
Infantrymen, your advice is needed:
FIANCEE IS READY TO BREAK UP WITH SOLDIER ON EXTENDED TOUR
DEAR CHUCK Z: I need your advice on how to break an engagement with my fiance, whose tour of duty in Iraq has been extended four more months. He has been there eight months, and during his absence, I met someone else I would like to start dating.
I didn't want to stress out my fiance, and I wanted to wait until he returned to talk to him, but now I feel too guilty, so I need to address it soon. Please help me. -- FEELING GUILTY, MEMPHIS, TENN.
Your comments below, please.