Hurricane John is hammering southern Baja right now which is always good news for SoCal surfers like me, but now it's even sweeter. A couple weeks back at the UDT/SEAL Reunion in Coronado, Jesse "the Loser" Ventura showed up bragging about his new digs on the beach just north of Cabo San Lucas, BC, MX. He looks worse every year and he didn't disappoint. Now he has dyed his shoulder length hair jet black (except for the bald dome on top) with a jet black beard which has only one Captain Jack Sparrow chin braid instead of two.
One thing that hasn't changed is that talking to him is still like talking to an Autorantic Virtual Moonbat. For every question he has a conspiracy theory answer-the dark side is strong in this one. In fact, at the after party on Saturday night at McP's in Coronado, a friend and I pointed him out to a couple of girls in town from South Dakota. Not knowing any better, they commented that they'd love to have a picture with "the Loser". Knowing that Jesse is a shameless attention whore, I walked over to him and told him to stand up and get a pic with a couple of his admirers. He quickly obliged and asked them where they were from. When they replied, "South Dakota!", all he had to say was, "They outlawed abortion in South Dakota!", as if they were responsible. What a tool.
While he'll always have his lackeys, Ventura's act has become very tired around the beer truck, so when you do see him wearing a Trident and wrapping himself in the flag rest assured that real SEALs don't have much use for him.
Rumor has it that he was going to be part of a reality TV show and his contract stipulated that if it didn't happen he'd get to walk away with $10 million. Apparently that's just what happened and he took some of his windfall and invested in a $1.5 million beach house near Cabo. It wouldn't bother me if this $hitbird's pad got washed away.