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One Marine's View - Interview w/ Capt B in Iraq

Many folks asked for interviews with milboggers who are "boots on the ground",  Capt_b_smoking Capt B of One Marine's View is the first victim. I like his mix of enthralling stories and a bit of a smart ass tone, but you can decide why you like it for yourself. I sent some off beat questions and he came through with some flavor in return.

What is the one simple pleasure you miss the most from the good old USA? Pick one that I can do in Madison, WI in the winter and I will enjoy it for you and post pics. I always craved Taco Bell when I was someplace crappy for too long, so, outside of strip bars, what can I do for you?

I miss the things I believe in. I believe the US flag shouldn’t touch the ground and you should get on your feet when it passes in front of you. I believe America is the greatest place on earth and has the best people in the world. I believe in the soul, the truth, the smell of a woman, the bomb pass in football, regular Pepsi, a strong cigar any time of the day or night, the V8 small block engine could be the best engine ever built, I believe its ok to kill a mosquito with a sledge hammer, I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve, and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days but hey this is just one Marine’s point of view. Take your pick and do it really good.

Are you proud to carry on the long and illustrious history of the Naval Infantry, or does it chafe your cones when Army clowns like me use that term?

LOL Yes, I love carrying on a long tradition within our military service. In fact I wouldn’t want to be doing anything else. I really can’t believe I get paid to do this stuff. Plus, the Navy is always good for a good taxi ride anytime we need it. The Marine Corps is a department of the Navy, yes but we are the Men’s department. With all of the ribbing aside, through OEF & OIF all of the services are very professional and when I need air support from an Army Apache, I could care less as long as they hit the bad guys and not me.

How engaged are your Marines in the strategic implications of nation-building in Iraq v. the daily mission?

If you look at it the daily Lance Corporal’s actions out on the streets, he is doing more in the strategic applications in a couple days than some of the many senior officers can do in a month in Baghdad. Having boots on the ground, making a difference and changing lives is what moves the strategic goal one step at a time.

Do you have any journalists you particularly loathe?

I thought Lois Lane was a bit nosey; she just about blew the super fighting cape crusader’s cover numerous times. Sometimes you got to go with your gut call. If he fly’s like Superman, looks like Superman, well he probably is Superman. How tuff is that one?? This simplicity needs to be applied here in Iraq. If it looks like we are winning, well we are. I had Geraldo visit us in Afghani, Ollie North here in Ramadi, and saw that joker Anderson Cooper in Baghdad along with the rest of the Communist News Network robots, don’t get me started. Fox news should make a “reporter” calendar because hands down they have the prettiest reporters.  Col North was cool and is still a Marine through and through, hooked up pictures with the men and signed books Marines had in their hummers when he ran into us downtown Ramadi. I recently met Bill Roggio from the Blog, Fourth Rail and he was all over the area with us and pretty down to earth.

Have you ever blown up or shot something in an entertaining way?

We had captured a weapons cache in Afghani, a BIG one and as we piled the weapons up the next door neighbor tribal leader showed up and “told” me he was taking those weapons from the feuding tribe we just confiscated them from. Being surrounded by 2 infantry Platoons he had these two girlie men (no kidding they were out of a very bad B movie) charge their AK’s as in an act to threaten us. I told my terp to translate to them “you just made a very bad mistake and you could have been killed “  as my Marines drew in on them as they charged their weapons. So after detaining him and his two girlfriends we sat them in a safe distance away from the pile of weapons on an adjacent hill but high enough for them to watch the fireworks show.

Tell us about the most memorable Iraqi military person you have met, and the most memorable civilian.

That’s an easy one. We provided security as the docs treated some locals in this village. I happen to notice a stack of Pakistani made Pepsi off against the wall. Although we were out in the middle of nowhere you could get anything just about. I made a deal to buy all of it with the shop owner and spread it out to the men. It wasn’t cold but it didn’t matter. I was being watched though. I could feel eyes burning through me and almost wanted to aim in on them. But as I turned it was a small 3-4 yr old girl. Dirty nasty little “thing” sitting there. I looked at her and she at me. Its taboo for a female to look a man in the eyes in their customs. She was too young to know or care. I got up and moved towards her and she protected herself and flinched like I was going to smack her. I crunched down on a knee and spoke easy to see if she would like a Pepsi. She probably never had one in her life and was scared. I open one for her and took a drink and then set it in front of her. She just looked at it as a bigger kid grabbed it and began to run. I snatching him up by the collar I made him give it back. She took it and sat down next to me on the edge of the busy street. We just sat there and she and I enjoyed a hot Pepsi in the middle of hell with dozens of kids and adults surrounding us. I wasn’t worried as I had a full combat platoon providing security and occasionally intermingling with the local people. I didn’t know what these kids future would be once we departed here but I know that as we sat there no one was hurting these kids, at least while I we were there.

What message, ignored or downplayed by the MSM, about our role in Iraq do you think it is most important for the American people to hear?

WOW, well its actually very simple but is the focus point for both the supporters and anti supporters of the war. We are winning and doing a just thing here. We are so close to this thing taking off on its own and the Iraqi people taking the reins. I wouldn’t be surprised if it didn’t happen in the next year. For example the other day in Ramadi, a suicide vest attacker blew himself up in the crowed and although wounding and killing numerous Iraqi’s and Coalition service embers, they simply got back in line to be accepted in the service. That wouldn’t have happened a year ago. They would have fled and we would be back to the drawing board. You got to war a chance and with the kick butt support Ive seen from the American people we will wrap this thing up and get the hell outa dodge, but only when its time to.


If you were me and I was back in the states what would you want to hear the American people saying about Iraq and the American service members?

For doing your duty
For setting an example
For freeing tens of millions from oppression
For reminding crap weasels worldwide, the chopper whop whops for thee

How can some say they support the troops but not the war?

Because they are dirty, nasty, patchouli-smelling hippies, oh sorry I just wanted to write that.  No wait, that is the answer. That and far too many don't really support the troops but condescendingly consider them dim bulbs or Neanderthal savages and simply tools of the neocon imperialist conspiracy.

What do you do for fun? I like to hang upside down blindfolded and take apart my weapon real quick and put it back together before my nose starts to bleed!

I like to play Marine pinata. No, these days I get a little joy from editorially eviscerating ass clowns who once went unchallenged in their "reporting". I giggle like a school girl, when I get an email dripping with the spittle I caused to fly uncontrollably across the internets from another aggrieved progressive. I also groove on making sure that more good MFs like CAPT B get heard.

                               - Uncle J